I consider myself a feminist. I don’t know all the ins and out of what a feminist ‘should’ say and do, and I wear a bra. I also need Bob. I don’t need him to tell me I can / can’t do things but we are a team and I need him to get my back. But needing each other doesn’t mean we aren’t equal.
I am pro equality of the sexes, whether it is in the workplace, at home doing the laundry or dishes, childcare and breadwinners and all other breaking of male and female stereotypes. They have no place in our lives any longer. I actually live a fairly stereotypical life. Bob is the breadwinner and I look after the house and children. But those are roles we have chosen and if I’m not happy and Bob needs to do more he certainly knows about it! If I’m at home I’m happy to take care of the kids and home, but if we are both at home then we both do. Team work.
However, call me a hypocrite or not, but I certainly wouldn’t want to be a man in today’s society. I think that although women’s roles are improving (with a long long way to go don’t get me wrong) men have a pretty rough deal too and their roles don’t seem to be improving as drastically.
I’m sure a bra burning feminist would argue that it has been a man’s world up until very recently, and in many workplaces or situations it still very much is. But as I have already said I believe in equality for both sexes. And I am SO glad that I can cry, whine to my friends and throw a strop without being considered a freak (annoying, yes, but not a freak ).
Many men, need much of the same things a woman does. They need their friends to confide in, they need a good cry, they need a hug from their mummy, but they don’t because it’s not the ‘man thing’ to do. I would spontaneously combust if I didn’t have my friends as an outlet.
I certainly don’t fancy my role being reversed with Bob. Horrible as it is waking up every day with the weight of PND on my brain and my soul, imagine this: Imagine living with someone who is a grumpy twat aaaaaall the time, finding it stressful and upsetting but not being able to cry / talk / confide in any one? No thank you!
So men, here is my request. Give each other some slack. Talk. Listen. And be there for each other (not in a slap your back, down a pint and kick in the nuts type way).
And women, give your men some slack. Don’t be a bitch. But don’t run around after him either. But don’t expect him to run around after you.
Just because stereotypes exists doesn’t mean you need to conform to them. We need to be true to ourselves and accepting of others who don’t fit into those boxes.
Equal rights and equal feelings. Anyone should be able to cry, laugh and wear suspenders should they so desire. Come on society. We have a long way to go but only we can change it, it can’t change itself.